Wednesday, June 10, 2009

the many negative effects of fast food

Besides making us extremely fat, I am convinced that the convenience of fast food has made us all terribly inept in the kitchen.  

I had a roommate once who caught the stove on fire making Tuna Helper. For one thing, Tuna Helper is disgusting. I think I'd rather eat ham. And if you know me at all, you know how much I loathe all things pork (except bacon, of course). But come on...how do you set the stove on fire making something that comes out of a box?

Oh, that's right. You forget to take it out of the box.

This must have happened to someone who bought a pizza from the Wal-Mart deli, like I did a few nights ago.  

You know, these ones:

As one is supposed to do, I, of course, read the instructions before throwing it in the oven willy-nilly. I expected to see something like "bake at 375 degrees for 15 minutes."  

But I forgot about the fast food and the whole inept-in-the-kitchen thing. So instead, the directions read:

Notice #2:  Remove plastic and cardboard from pizza.  

Wow.  Just...wow.

4 comments:

Emily said...

I'm glad our conversation inspired you to post. I love your posts, even about pizza boxes!

By the way, I had to teach Sarah D. how to scramble eggs when we lived together in Conway. It was sad. ;)

Ross said...

I'm glad that you know how to cook! And I'm glad that you're teaching me...a couple of years ago I might have needed those directions :-(

Michael said...

The whole pizza on fire thing--totally happened. Freshman year, in Pomfret, 2 a.m. Somebody started a fire by cooking a pizza in the communal oven when it was still wrapped in plastic. No lie.

Leah said...

Well, I knew it must have happened to somebody. Usually, the catalyst for including those instructions in the first place is that it happened to someone.

I should do a post about ridiculous instructions! Yes! I love this idea.